boundary setting 101

Tuesday, March 11, 2014









some green things - oh my I ♡ geranium buds / a swath of geranium leaves / Virgil tucked away in the orange mamma hideaway / Virginia Creeper cuttings meet soil / random miniature rose photo from les archives / windowsill gardening /not sure what this is-to be planted outside come spring

you have to have endless love
with constant boundaries

Drew Barrymore

I think it's only in the past year that I've really understood the importance of boundary setting, and for that matter it's only in the past year that I've really believed that I have the right & deserve to set boundaries. Like so much in life I learned these new lessons the hard way, sadly the best way, by having to set hard & firm boundaries in more than one relationship. The personal boundaries that you know are essential to your own well being but boundaries that you also know - will be not land well, that will met with unpleasantness to varying degrees, sometimes bordering on bullying & controlling behaviour. Most of us females have a hard time potentially ruffling feathers, we people-please to our own detriment. Like any other muscle this boundary setting muscle takes practice to build and with practice it does become easier - well, maybe easier's not the word - essential & important are better, more true words. The instantaneous relief you feel when you know you've stood up for yourself, your life & your values makes the hard and the terrible dread about doing it all worth it in the end. A gem from Brené Brown les boundary setting script, let's get this printed on a business size card, laminate it and carry it on our person at all times.

here's what I need
here's how I'm feeling
here's what's not okay
you don't have to like it
you don't have to agree with it
but if we are going to be in a relationship
you have to respect it. 

Brené Brown


3 comments:

  1. Boundaries are important, I need to set a few myself,though I am not in a relationship I still have so much to learn about self worth...great words from Drew Barrymore and Brené Brown.
    Beautiful photos, I love the scent of geranium leaves and flowers. I don't know the name of the flower in the last image but it is very pretty.
    Love to all
    xoxoxo ♡

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  2. Totally off topic.

    1. you make the best salads !
    2. love your geraniums.
    3. if I find a Virginia Creeper vine can I cut it and root it inside now ?

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  3. I've had to set some boundaries myself in the recent past and it surprised me how liberating it was and how much better my relationships have become. I don't think it's anything we have to apologize for at all. It's really just about voicing our intentions, our wants and our needs. People can't read our minds, right? As a side - when I see your food photos - it makes me want to eat more vegetables. :-) Have a beautiful Nova Scotia day! xo

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